Thanksgiving is a great holiday. It’s all about family and sharing a meal together with the people you love. But what happens when you are in the middle of a divorce? The giant elephant in the room can’t be ignored, even if you stuff yourself to death with food and distract yourself with side conversations. You are reminded on this day that something in your life is broken and you are certainly not thankful for being in this situation. So how do you handle Thanksgiving while you are going through a divorce?
Focus on the positive.
Resist the urge to spill your unhappiness and discontent to others. Whatever you do, try not to turn Thanksgiving into Pittygetting. Instead, focus on the positive things in your life you should be thankful for. Look around the room. You are alive. You are not alone. You have great people in your corner that love and care about you and will continue to do so unconditionally long after the divorce is over. Don’t make this day about the “wrong one”. Make it all about the “right ones”.
It only gets better from here.
Take comfort in knowing that next Thanksgiving is going to be much happier. No matter what kind of a divorce you have, the average shelf life of divorce cases in New York is less than one year. This means that by next Thanksgiving, it is very likely that your divorce will be over or will be nearing conclusion.
Hug it out.
One of the main side effects of going through a divorce is the loss of physical affection that was previously shared with a spouse. When you first met, you held hands, hugged, kissed and cuddled. With time, the amount of physical affection may have tapered off, but with divorce, it’s probably gone completely. Thanksgiving is a perfect time to refill on this much needed physical affection from your family and friends that will be happy to provide it to you with genuine love that is certain to make you feel better.
Huddle your team.
You are on your home turf on Thanksgiving. The people around you today are your best allies so take this time to fix any broken links and patch up any issues with your team members. You will need their support and help through the emotional divorce rollercoaster ahead. Remember that regardless of the issues you encountered, unlike your soon to be ex-spouse, your family and friends are still here for you and will be there to see you through this.
Thank your divorce lawyers.
As your divorce attorneys, we are trusted with the most private and personal of all of your affairs. We fight to preserve everything you love and care about. For the duration of your divorce, we become part of your trusted circle and take on the role of counseling and protecting you. Divorce lawyers often sacrifice their own time with their families and people they love in order to keep yours safe. If you have good divorce attorneys on your side, let these lawyers know that you appreciate their time and effort. Trust me, it goes a long way and will be much appreciated.
In the end, if you find yourself unable to do any of the above, just call your divorce lawyers and ask them to tell you about some other crazy case they handled. Chances are, after hearing their war stories, you will feel thankful this Thanksgiving holiday that your situation is not nearly as bad as it could have been.